From my experience of the study of psychology and with so-called anger management gurus the brain is always a topic, and with one’s hard-earned money wasted on it. To me it has always been confusing and of no benefit whatsoever. Don’t get me wrong, but unless we are dealing with medication and the effects of it on our mental state, then what is the point? In fact if one is unfortunate enough to be prescribed drugs in an attempt to solve one’s problems, how often does the specialist open up the conversation on the various functions of the brain with the patient, they don’t, because it is of not use?! It’s a bit like going to the doctor with a pain in your leg. You don’t get a rundown of the bones, muscle formations, nerves and sinews in the area of concern. Why would you?

So why is it such a common topic with psychotherapists? In my opinion it is an excuse for their ignorance in understanding the basic nature of the mind, consciousness and its processes.

This is not to say that the brain and the nervous system are somehow unelated to our experience, of course they are. But if we were to by into the idea that the brain is running the show then what would be the point in applying an effort to change how we think and feel, because it would be totally out of our grasp?

The fact is, we don’t need to spend more than 5 minutes considering the brain. Granted we can talk about fight, flight and freeze – experiences and reactions which are common with dysfunctional emotions. And that is the idea that I am getting to – we must delve into those ‘experiences’ because that is where our solutions lie, and not by being presented with a half-baked and confusing theory about what the meat in our head is up to by someone who is not a neuroscientist.

The fact is, and this is all I have to say about the brain, is that it works for us, and what I mean by that is when considering our thoughts, emotions, feelings and our perceptions of the world ‘we can train it, and we are not enslaved by it!’

You Can Train Your Brain to Respond Differently

Let me give you an example. Recently I bought a motorbike. The last one I owned was 25 years ago and I sold it, because I had a monumental panic on the motorway and every time after that I would instantly experience the same thing again when on the motorway.  My flight and freeze responses were screaming at me there was immediate danger and I had to pull over. It was incredibly overwhelming and dangerous, and I really didn’t know what to do about it. I even rode thousands of miles around Europe, which was torture, in the hope that it would go away, but it didn’t, so I sold it, determined I would never ride another motorcycle again. For me this was pretty upsetting because I loved riding them.

So, 25 years later, and with a better understanding of what was happening, I decided to by another one, knowing farewell that the experience would instantly happen again because that is what happens, but with the dogged determination that I could get over it.

It took me 8 weeks in total, working on myself every single day, but I managed to retrain my brain to respond differently, and now the experience is more pleasant than ever.

How did I do it you might ask? What I didn’t do was get an explanation of how my amygdala and cortex were functioning in those moments. Nor did I medicate myself. What I did do however, was reflect on the experience, visualize the experience, recognise my thinking, feelings and emotions when on the motorway, analysed everything what was happening in my experience, and simply went out there and faced my fears every single day with the belief that I could do it. And as I’ve already said I did it. And that is just one example!

That is what we do at Anger and Stress Management SOS. Just that. No nonsense, straight forward and straight to the point. Everything we deliver is understandable and related to YOUR experience, so you will have everything you need to understand yourself and overcome your unwanted emotional reactions and thinking.

For further information on the Programs which we offer please go to the Services section and/or book a 20 minute consultation with myself, and discuss how we can help you.